Well, that was terrifying

I just crossed a huge bridge in my career development as a scientist: I submitted my first first-author manuscript for publication. Gulp. I can't even tell you the amount of time that has been devoted to this manuscript. The project was the one that was going to be my Master's thesis when I was still an M.S. student. That's how long it's been going on. Something that was supposed to be quick and dirty ended up being very long and needing extremely complicated statistics to analyze the data. And since I am not capable of performing extremely complicated statistics, I had to enlist the help of a very gifted professor in the department, who analyzed the data for me and wrote the methods section related to the stats. All of that earned him third author. Second author is of course my science idol, the research director at the zoo, the same one who invited me to Minnesota in January. I can't even begin to tell you how patient she was with me throughout this whole process, putting up with all of my annoying questions right up until this morning. We were all ready to submit last year when one of the co-authors suggested we run a different kind of analysis. Literally the day before we were going to submit. So, we redid everything and I had to rewrite, redo figures, etc. But in the end, I hope that it makes our argument more robust and lends even greater credibility to the study.

For you non-science folk, there are two key kinds of currency in our field: publications and grants. Those two things make you marketable for jobs. And while publications in general are important, first-author publications are gold. When you are first author, you have done a majority of the work and have written the bulk of the manuscript. The research is your baby. I have various publications already, going back to my DC job, but this is the first one in which I am lead author, so it's really, really exciting. But obviously I couldn't have done this project without the help of my co-authors and other people who have helped me along the way.

So, what happens now? In general, it takes a few months for you to hear back from the journal. There could be a few outcomes:

1. The manuscript is accepted as-is (not going to happen) for publication
2. The manuscript is rejected outright by the journal's EIC for some reason like it doesn't fit the scope of the journal (hopefully won't happen)
3. The manuscript goes into the review process in which experts in the field (we suggested reviewers) decide if your manuscript is publication-worthy for this journal. That's the 'peer-review process' you hear about in the media. From there, the manuscript could either be accepted with revisions or rejected. If it's accepted, you go back and follow their instructions, whether it be minor edits, major revisions, or even additional experiments. If it's rejected, you resubmit to another journal (reformatting everything including references, tables, figures, etc.) and repeat the whole process.

You can see why it sometimes takes years for a manuscript to be published. But having just this first step completed makes me feel awesome. Just one item crossed off my list, not that it's necessarily crossed off because there will be either edits or resubmission, but progress nonetheless. I should also be finishing data collection for the first chapter of my dissertation today, which means that the whole writing process starts up again for that study. Hooray for progress. Finally. And since I won't pass up the opportunity to show pictures of myself with wolves, here I am again in Minnesota with a wolf. It's relevant since the manuscript was about wolves and I hate to publish without a picture.

GO! Half-marathon recap

You may or may not have noticed that I have not really discussed running much or training for the race that took place last Sunday. Mainly because I did not do much running or training for the race that took place last Sunday. I lost a lot of motivation to run after the new year due to a combination of factors. I can only blame myself; I can make all the excuses in the world, but I could have pushed myself harder to get up earlyto run before work or to run in the afternoon when I had the opportunity. I didn't run at all while in Minnesota and it all kind of fell apart after that. Even with my fancy new Garmin, I just didn't have it in me. Living at my mom's made it harder for me to motivate myself. Another thing I love about living in the city and next to one of the country's largest urban parks is that I always see people out running no matter what time it is. In the suburbs? Not so much. There's nothing like the idea of running along the pitch black suburban streets on a cold morning to make you want to stay in bed. And like I've mentioned several times, issues at school made it hard for me to motivate myself because I was often so angry/upset/mentally and emotionally exhausted that I just wanted to go home to my dog and my husband.

So, about four weeks before the race, I thought, "holy shit, this race is right around the corner!" I had been running just a couple days/week (and my weight shows it) and I had to ramp up both the mileage and the frequency. I followed no training plan, just remembering that the one I usually use involves an 8-mile run, a 10-mile run, and two 12-mile runs. I did my 8-mile run, I did my 10-mile run. I did various 3-5, 5-6-mile runs. But I was slow! Like, slower than ever slow. I even had to stop and walk, which I've never had to do before. Folks, I was out of shape for the first time in years and it sucked. Instead of making me more motivated to run more often, that made me less motivated. As for those 12-mile runs? Didn't happen. I tried to run 12 miles the weekend before the race and I made it seven. So, I went into the race having completed one 10-mile training run since last year's race. As such, I had very modest goals. Here they are in order of difficulty

1. Finish without walking
2. Finish in under 2 hours
3. Finish with under a 9min/mile average

Last year I finished in just under 1:50, so it was depressing to think I might need 10 more minutes. But I just had to remind myself that I barely trained, I am in constant back and pelvis pain, and I ain't getting any younger.

I started off the race feeling really good, as it's easy to get swept up in the excitement of a competition. Jason rode his bike along the course, as he always does, and caught me right at the beginning. The weather was lovely that early in the morning (but I feel for the full marathoners who had to deal with the heat later in the day). I couldn't believe how many people were there this year! I think there were 12,500 half-marathoners registered and 3,000 marathoners, plus relay teams. It was really awesome and more runners means more spectators, which helps to move you along.

I ended up keeping pretty good pace until the last few miles. There were some HUGE hills on the course this year. I must have been mouth-breathing all over this girl on one such hill because she turned to me and said, "good job." I replied, "I know I probably sound like I'm about to die. Is this the biggest hill?" She thought about it and before she could respond, I said, "Just lie and tell me it is." And then there was the minor issue that I hadn't run more than 10 miles during training. I knew I wasn't going to match or beat my personal best time, so I just kind of went with it those last few miles. My hip flexor was aching so badly at that point and I caught up with Jason again and he rode alongside me for the last bit and encouraged me to keep going when I thought I'd have to slow down (and even walk). When a group of girls passed me, I couldn't bear to have that many female finishers ahead of me, so I sped up and sprinted (for me) to the finish. My official time is 1:52:07 and even though I finished faster the last two years, I'm really, really happy with that result. I mean, 60th place in my division isn't so bad? Here are the official results:

And here is the breakdown from my Garmin. I'm really proud of myself for only breaking 9:00 for one mile of the race. But it sure wasn't easy! Kinda makes me wonder how well I would do if I trained hard, ate well, and drank less!

But did I go home and rest on my laurels? Not immediately. We had two showings on Sunday, so we had to go straight home to finish cleaning, pack up both birds in their smaller "camp" cages, and Levi to head over to my mom's. Having your house on the market blows. Anyway, we did get to go enjoy good food and beer with first-time marathoner Jenn (yay, Jenn!) at Schlafly Bottleworks later that afternoon.

Well, here are some pictures from the race. But first, can we just talk about something? You know how you look at the gossip magazines at the grocery store (or online) and see pictures of celebrities in bathing suits and their cellulite is magnified by the publication? Yeah, so I was looking at the pictures Jason took of me and was completely HORRIFIED by what I saw. My thighs. Oh. My. God. I mean, I did that thing where I used the magnifying glass to zoom in on the offending area. I know I don't have shapely legs, but I'm usually so fixated on my stomach area that I don't notice what's going on below my belly. Well, the combination of fat, muscle (???), and motion was not a pretty sight. If I were famous, my thighs would be plastered all over The National Enquirer. I just kept saying, "Is that what I really look like???" I'm scarred for life. And I deleted all those pictures and/or cropped them. Aside over now.

I love this picture because, despite my "I'm miserable" face, I look pretty good compared to the guy on the end.

I like this one because the offending inner thigh is hidden by my other leg.

I made sure to get my registration money's worth by grabbing one of everything offered at the finish line. I'm not exactly sure what is going on with the girl behind me.

Thanks to Jason for being an awesome cheerleader.

And I of course had to pose with my puppy dog when I got home. He says, "momma, you smell like pretzels, bagels, bananas, Wheaties, and cookies."

Congrats to everyone who ran the race! Until 2011!

Levi, spring, random real estate musings

I just wanted to clarify something about my last post because I'm afraid I came off sounding like a brat. I realize that many people commute far longer than I had to while living at my mom's and don't complain about it. The major frustration for me was that the commute was mostly spent sitting in traffic on Forest Park Parkway or Clayton Road. There's nothing worse than sitting through three or four light cycles and not going anywhere. Even though the commute was still longer than what I was used to once the highway opened, it was a breeze because I actually moved instead of being stuck in stop-and-go traffic. So, I apologize if I offended anyone:)

I also have my half-marathon post in the works too, but I wanted to get these pictures up first.

I've said multiple times how spoiled I am living within walking distance to Forest Park. Between running and walking Levi, I am often in the park twice a day. I really missed the park while living at my mom's. My mom lives in a small neighborhood off a road with no sidewalk. Not very conducive to walking your dog. Luckily, her neighborhood backs up to a school, so we usually took Levi there to run around the fields. But it's just not the same as good ol' Forest Park. We can go there every day and visit a different area each time. Levi missed it too, I think. By the time we moved back home, I think we both realized that we are city people and will most likely purchase a house in the city. Sure, it's not as safe as the county, but we just couldn't trade being able to walk to shops and restaurants and actually seeing people out and about at all times for a 'safer' life in the suburbs. Furthermore, almost everything we do is in the city (other than Jason's job) and I want to be in on the action. [I realize there are areas of St. Louis that are 'city-like,' (e.g. Clayton, downtown Webster), but we can't afford to live in them]

We moved back to the city just in time to experience the beauty of Forest Park in the spring. I took a few pictures of the beautiful blooming trees.

How cool are these leaves? They look like little hearts.

I also wanted to get a few pictures of Levi wearing his new collar outside. Levi has an awesome bottlecap collar that we purchased at Four Muddy Paws, but he's lost so much weight that it doesn't fit anymore. I wanted to get him a new, high quality leather collar that will hopefully be his permanent collar.

I learned of the company Paco Collars on the Pit Bull Forum, on which I lurk daily. The owner is a devoted pit bull advocate and I was happy to support her business. Of course Jason and I couldn't agree on which collar to get, but guess who won out? He can pick out the collar for our next dog;) Anyway, we were very happy with the quality of the collar when we received it. Each one is custom made so it takes a few weeks for delivery, but it is totally worth it. We even paid the extra $5 to have LEVI stamped into the collar's tongue. As a bonus? Paco Collars was generously donating 20% of each purchase to Our Pack, Inc., a California-based advocacy group devoted to pit bull rescue. And they are still running the promotion if you are shopping for a new collar.

And here is my new favorite picture of Levi. Seriously, I just love it, from the way the light hits his beautiful amber eyes to the definition on his ear fur. I love this dog, people. And this is where teaching him to lay his head down comes in handy!

I hope everyone else is having a good spring!

Adventures in real estate

I can finally reveal my secret! No, I'm not pregnant. We're selling our condo! Well, it's not selling and that's a problem, but we are hopefully on the path toward fulfilling one of my goals for the year: moving into a house. The reason I couldn't say anything is because we were living with my mom until this weekend and I didn't want to advertise the fact that our place was vacant. We thought it would be easier to have showings if we didn't have to vacate with our dog and two birds. My mom has been unbelievably gracious to host all of us for so long, but we did not want to be in her way any longer. People I know IRL and on Facebook already know about all this, but I wanted to "journal" about the experience for myself.

Where to begin? You may recall that we were going to put our condo on the market last January (2009) but bad stuff happened and we were unable to do so. We ended up just leaving all the stuff we packed up in our rented storage unit. In other words, it's been over a year since I've seen all of my personal photos, decorations, etc. Fast-forward to late last summer when we re-evaluated our finances and realized that moving was indeed possible.

So, we slaved away on our condo, getting it ready for the market. We recovered chairs, cleaned like you wouldn't believe (I actually cleaned all the grout in the shower with a toothbrush), put tons of stuff into storage, did some painting, and it looks beautiful in the real estate photos, if I do say so myself. Jason and everyone else thinks I'm insane, but HGTV has influenced me for better or worse.

It officially went on the market in early October. My mom lives in the county and we live in the city. The highway that links my mom's house, our condo, my job, and Jason's job was closed for almost two years. Let me tell you how spoiled I was living close to school while in the condo. The commute to my mom's from school was a complete nightmare. That was definitely the worst part of all of this. It was really, really hard adjusting to a new schedule in which I'd have to tack on at least 30 minutes each way, while still trying to work a full day and get home to take Levi on a walk. My mom was kind enough to let him out of his crate in the afternoon, but we didn't want to count on her to do so. But the skies parted and the angels in heaven sang a sweet chorus when Highway 40 reopened (slightly) ahead schedule in December. It made everything so much easier and I no longer had the rage, people. But I digress.

There hasn't been very much interest in the condo and we've reduced the price twice in order to stay in line with price reductions/new listings in the area. Luckily, I've been in the condo for over six years, so we will walk away with a profit. Showings have been spotty, with up to four in one week, then none for a month. Our chances of being able to take advantage of the existing homebuyers tax credit are slim at this point, as you have to be under contract by the end of the month.

Feedback has generally been extremely positive, with everyone saying it shows very well. But, you can't please anyone, I've learned. And I can't change things like the layout or the number of bathrooms or what floor it's on. The problem is the market is just so saturated right now. We realized this would not be a fast process, but it is starting to get frustrating. With the number of showings we've had, we decided it was not worth it to infringe on my mom's space any longer and moved home.

I really enjoyed living with my mom. I will be forever grateful that we have a close relationship and that living together brought us closer (her opinion might be different, so I will only speak for myself). I will always cherish the memories from the last six months and the extra time I spent living in my childhood home when she no longer lives there. She embraced our aloof pit bull with open arms and a never ending supply of treats. It took months, but she won him over and they even had their special routine when she let him out of his crate. She endured Monty and Lola's screaming when she wanted to work on her computer. She put up with all of our crap everywhere, my incessant chatter, and the confinement of her cat to her bedroom. She made us dinners from time to time (and we tried to reciprocate) and called the plumber when my long hair clogged the shower. We bought a fire pit and huddled around it on a chilly fall night while watching a movie on my laptop. She patiently comforted me when I cried almost daily during a rough patch at school earlier this year. My mom doesn't read my blog (because she talks to me, she says) but I still want to publicly thank her for being so generous with her home, her time, and her love the past six months. I hope she enjoyed it as much as we did.

And I think I'll end on that note. I have a lot more to say about our situation and how living with her helped us decide where we ultimately want to live, but this has gotten pretty long!

Here's one good memory-one mom, one husband, two nephews, one dog, and a whole lot of drool in our bed at my mom's watching the Rams lose.

10 Things to do in St. Louis in April

Haven't done one of these for the last few months, but now that the weather is getting nicer, I thought it would be good to put out a list. It's so easy for me to be lazy every Saturday, especially when I have handsome visitors, but I fear my husband might divorce me if we spend another Saturday night at home in our jammies. I'm stealing somewhat from last year's list, but a good event is a good event, right?

1. Canstruction at the Missouri History Museum (through 4/5): This exhibit is almost over, so catch it this weekend if you can. Now, it sounds kind of weird, but go to this website to see what it's all about. Basically, huge, intricate sculptures are made entirely out of cans in order to raise awareness and collect food for local food pantries and charities. Pretty cool, huh? Just for our lovely city, they have created sculptures in the likeness of Bevo Mill and the Spirit of St. Louis. Although the event is free, you should bring a can to support local efforts to feed the hungry.

2. GO! St. Louis Family Fitness Weekend (4/11-4/12): Once again, lots of events going on as part of the family fitness weekend. The Expo is not just for participants; you can peruse everything from athletic attire to custom earbuds. If you haven't been training for the long races, there are also races like the Mature Mile and the Children's Mile. Or, you can come cheer me on as I attempt to complete a half-marathon having virtually not trained at all. But that is for a different post.

3. Conservation Conversations at the St. Louis Zoo (4/13): The latest installment in the adult lecture series at the zoo features the author of Animal Investigators, a book I really need to read. This book reveals the inside life of the US Fish and Wildlife Service Forensics Laboratory, or the "CSI of wildlife." These people are charged with the daunting and important task of solving crimes related to the trade of endangered species. I remember hearing an interview with someone from their lab on NPR and being completely mesmerized (and also wondering how I could get a job like that).

4. Repeal of Prohibition Beer Festival (4/17): Once again, Schlafly Bottleworks is celebrating the anniversary of the event that would one day make it possible for me to survive graduate school. Not only can you sample Schlafly brews, but also favorites from Michigan microbreweries.

5. Darwin exhibit at the Saint Louis Science Center (4/17-8/1): What a cool exhibit! Come learn about Darwin, his revolutionary theory of natural selection, his journey aboard the Beagle, what was believed prior to his publications, and the ongoing debate over evolution. I hereby vow to visit this exhibit before it leaves town.

6. Cause for the Paws (4/18): I can't miss the opportunity to spread the word about a Stray Rescue fundraiser. This event will take place in gorgeous Queeny Park, a favorite of Levi's. The entry fee is $15 and you can walk on either a short or long loop. There will also be a silent auction following the walk at a Chesterfield bar. See the link for more details.

7. St. Louis Earth Day (4/25): We went last year and it was so much more than I expected! There was so much food to try and stupid us didn't bring any money! There are bands, crafts for sale, Schlafly beer, and of course educational information. The event is located in front of the Muny in Forest Park. Erin Bode is performing and I hear she's a big deal.

8. Greater St. Louis Book Fair (4/29-5/2): I got a surprising number of comments about this event last year, so I wanted to include it again this year. Macy's at West County Mall is hosting this charity book sale. The inventory is in the thousands and includes comic books and collectible editions, not to mention deals-$1 books, anyone? CDs, DVDs, and videos will also be available.

9. St. Louis Microfest (4/30-5/2): More beer for me! We took Levi to this event in Forest Park last year. It was surprisingly not that crowded for a Saturday evening and a lot less crowded than other similar events I've attended. My only gripe was that there was virtually nothing for me to eat, as everything contained meat. But, I would still highly recommend this event if you like beer. And I should add that all proceeds go toward the Lift for Life Gym.

10. What are you looking forward to this month?